


Apologies

by aeternamente



Series: Time and Space [7]
Category: Nothing Much to Do
Genre: M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2014-10-14
Updated: 2014-10-14
Packaged: 2018-02-21 05:01:47
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 2
Words: 1,970
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/2455736
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/aeternamente/pseuds/aeternamente
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>"There are just… so many things I feel terrible about right now, and maybe I can’t do anything to help John, or—” he swallowed “—or Hero, but I there are some things I can make right. Or I can try at least.”</p><p>Pretty heavily canonballed. I changed the ending so it wouldn't be quite so obviously not what happened, but it's still kinda off as far as Pedro's character development is concerned.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Chapter 1

**Beatrice, first attempt**

She opened the door.

"Listen, Bea, I know you probably want to slam the door in my face, and I’d probably deserve it if you did, but—"

"Yes, you do deserve it."

And she slammed the door in his face.

* * *

**Benedick**

Ben stood at the door to his room, silent and unsmiling, expectant.

"Look, Ben, about the other day—"

"I’m not taking that video down."

"That’s not—I don’t want—" He dragged a hand through his hair. "You were right to post it. We were being dicks, and I’m really, really sorry about all the things I said about Hero, and about you and Beatrice. I think you guys are great together."

A flicker of a smile tugged at the corner of Ben’s mouth, but given the circumstances, Pedro wasn’t surprised to see it disappear quickly.

"Oh," Pedro remembered, "and I’m sorry for hijacking your channel… again."

Ben shrugged. “I’m the one who never changed my password. Have you found him yet?”

Pedro sighed. “No, and there’s really nothing I can do about it at this point. Which is why I’m here, really. There are just… so many things I feel terrible about right now, and maybe I can’t do anything to help John, or—” he swallowed “—or Hero, but I there are some things I can make right. Or I can try at least.”

Ben paused for a moment, then nodded. “Well, good luck with that.”

"Thanks, man."

* * *

**Beatrice, second attempt**

_"Hey, you’ve reached Beatrice Duke. I can’t come to the phone right now, probably because I’m too busy sitting on my ass doing nothing, but you can pretend I’m doing something earthshatteringly important. Leave a message and I’ll call you back."_

_"After the tone, you may record your message."_

_BEEP._

"Hey, Bea, it’s Pedro. Listen, I know you’re mad at me, but I just want to say I’m sorry. I’m sorry for the way I’ve treated you and Hero, and I’m sorry for believing things about her that weren’t true. I know the truth now, and I just wish… I wish it hadn’t taken me this long to get my head out of my ass. I wish it hadn’t taken me until it was too late…

"…anyway, if there’s anything I can do, please tell me. I want to make things right."

* * *

**Leo**

Ben’s house was right at the foot of the hill, and you could see the school football field from his front yard. As Pedro glanced up, he noticed a figure moving just beyond the fence.

Leo.

It was pretty good exercise walking up to the field, and Pedro took a moment to catch his breath once he arrived, but Leo didn’t notice. He was focused on the precise movements of his feet as he manipulated the ball to move exactly where and when he wanted it to.

But Pedro knew how to find a good opening, and, jogging out to where Leo was, he deftly kicked the ball away from him and took it into his possession.

Leo looked up, recognized Pedro, and his face settled into a familiar smirk:  _game on_.

Back before Leo went to college, they’d had a lot of these one-on-one sessions, trying to steal the ball from each other, trying to keep possession when they had it. Back then, Leo went easy on him, often slipping into coach mode from competitor mode to take a moment to refine Pedro’s technique, teach him new tricks, but these days, Leo didn’t pull any punches. He was still better than Pedro, but Pedro liked the challenge, and didn’t mind having to fight for his share of the upper hand.

Today there was very little of their customary banter, which generally included intermingled camaraderie and trash talk. Pedro kept his silence out of respect for Leo’s state of mourning, and he knew that recent history still hung over their heads—the memory of Pedro and Claudio’s behavior after Claudio was kicked off the team. They couldn’t settle completely into their familiar patterns while this conflict remained unresolved.

In the midst of a particularly heated scuffle over the ball, Pedro accidentally kicked it farther afield than he’d intended, and it flew off toward the first row of risers, and that’s when both of them noticed Claudio sitting there, looking subdued and quite red around the eyes.

Claudio stood as Pedro and Leo approached.

"I, uh—" Claudio glanced over to Pedro, then back at Leo, "we heard about—about Hero."

Leo swallowed and nodded. “Yeah, she’s had a rough time of it, but she’s a fighter, she’ll pull through.”

"Wait…"

"Sh-she’s—" Claudio stuttered, "she’s not dead?"

"What? No."

"She’s not dead!" Claudio said, letting out an incredulous, breathy laugh.

Leo frowned. “Well, she  _is_  quite ill.”

"Nah, man, I didn’t mean—I’m sorry I just—we both thought—"

"Who told you she was dead?"

"Robbie, he said—"

"You believed  _Robbie?_ ”

"He confessed to everything."

"What do you mean? What did he confess to?"

"Okay," Pedro said, "start from the beginning. So you know those two year nines who have that detective show on Ursula’s channel?"

"Hugh and Georgia, yeah."

"Yeah, well this morning, they march up to us and they’ve got Robbie held between them like he’s a criminal or something, and Robbie just told us everything." Pedro explained about how John paid Robbie to trick everyone into thinking Hero had cheated on Claudio with him.

"Wait, your brother did that?"

Pedro pinched the bridge of his nose. “Yeah, and now he’s missing and nobody knows where he is.”

"I’m sorry to hear that."

"Yeah…" He thought about telling Leo about how he hadn’t gotten any sleep last night, about how he knew this was all his fault, that he had never even tried to be the brother he should be… but then he’d get sympathy, and he didn’t feel like he deserved sympathy. "Well, anyway, Robbie told us that Hero was dead, and, you know, since we were finally getting the truth about everything else, I guess I assumed that was the truth too."

Leo nodded, processing the information. “How do you think he got that idea?”

"Dunno."

They stood in silence for several moments.

"We probably should have known," Claudio said at length, "about Hero… that she would never…"

"Maybe," Pedro said. Something was tightening in his chest. Balthazar’s words from the other day had a way of sounding in his ears since he’d spoken them.  _”If you can support him after what he did to Hero, how do I know you wouldn’t do the same thing to me?”_ He swallowed. He needed to say something. “Maybe it shouldn’t matter if she did it or not.”

Both Leo and Claudio frowned at him. He needed to stand his ground.

"I think the way we treated her was wrong, no matter what she did or didn’t do."

Neither of them said anything. It was hard to tell what their reaction was, and maybe they themselves didn’t know what to think. It had taken Pedro a long time to work through all of it himself, to get past his own urge for self-justification.

So they’d probably need time too.

"Anyway," Pedro said, "I should go home. I don’t want to be late for dinner."

* * *

**Beatrice, first answer**

_"You have—two—new messages._

_"First new message—from—"_ (in Bea’s voice) _“Beatrice.”_ (back to automation) _“at_ _—five-eighteen—PM:”_

_"You can’t make things right, so just fuck off, okay?"_

* * *

**Ursula**

_"Second new message—from—"_ (in Ursula’s voice)  _"Ursula."_  (back to automation)  _"at—five-thirty-one—PM:"_

_"Pedro, it’s Ursula. Please call me back when you can."_

Pedro erased the messages and exited his voicemail, then called Ursula.

Ursula answered after just one ring. “You know Hero’s not dead, right?”

"So I’ve heard. Who started that rumor anyway?"

Ursula sighed. “Verges saw an ambulance and assumed the worst. Also, I may have to rethink letting people use my channel unsupervised.”

"…okay."

"Well I just wanted to make sure you knew. Talk to you later, Pedro."

"Ursula, wait," Pedro said. "I, uh… have you—have you talked to Balthazar lately?"

"I know what happened."

"Oh."

"Yeah."

"Look, the things he said—I really—I’m trying to make things right, I just—" he sighed, "I’m so afraid I’ve lost him."

"You haven’t. He loves you."

Pedro didn’t know what to say, didn’t know if he  _could_  say anything without crying.

"He’s my best friend," Ursula continued, "so it’s my duty to tell you that if you ever hurt him, I will end you. I have minions who are apparently not above doing illegal things."

"He’s my best friend too," Pedro said, "and I’ll take your word on the minions thing."

"We’ve always had his back. Both of us."

"Yeah, I only hope I won’t let him down again."

* * *

**Beatrice, second answer**

_"You have—one—new message._

_"First new message—from—"_ (in Bea’s voice) _”Beatrice.”_ (back to automation) _”at_ _—six-twelve—PM:”_

_"Okay, there is something you can do, but I’m only saying this because it’s not my job to decide whether to forgive you or not. That’s up to Hero, and I’m going to let her decide. Watch my next video, it’ll tell you what to do. And don’t think this gets you off the hook. Hero will probably forgive you, but I still think you’re an ass."_

* * *

**Balthazar**

After dinner, Pedro spent nearly an hour sitting in his room, staring at his phone. It wouldn’t do any good to try to call Beatrice again. He was resolved to do whatever she told him to do in her next video, and beyond that, forgiveness, if it happened at all, would happen on Bea’s terms (and Pedro knew she could hold a grudge). Instead of contemplating Bea’s entry in his address book, he was staring at the one that came before hers…

Balthazar’s.

He kept having to turn his screen back on as it timed out and went black. His thumb hovered over the call button. He just had to touch that little green phone icon. It was almost too easy to do, but it was also too difficult. He was too afraid he would only end up being a disappointment again.

The screen went black again and he left it that way.

"I’m not good enough for you."

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> If you want to see the original ending, click through to Chapter 2.


	2. Original Ending

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This is the canonballed original ending of Apologies.

**Balthazar**

After dinner, Pedro spent nearly an hour sitting in his room, staring at his phone. It wouldn’t do any good to try to call Beatrice again. He was resolved to do whatever she told him to do in her next video, and beyond that, forgiveness, if it happened at all, would happen on Bea’s terms (and Pedro knew she could hold a grudge). Instead of contemplating Bea’s entry in his address book, he was staring at the one that came before hers…

Balthazar’s.

He kept having to turn his screen back on as it timed out and went black. Finally, he gathered up his courage and went for it.

He pressed the call button.

It took several rings, but Balthazar answered. “Hey,” he said.

"Hey," Pedro said back. "What you said, it really—it make me think. I realized how wrong I was. I just… I wanted you to know, I’m trying to do better. I’m trying to  _be_  better.”

Balthazar said nothing.

"I know I don’t deserve you," Pedro felt a lump rising in his throat as he talked, and his voice was in danger of cracking, "but I miss you."

"I miss you too," Balthazar said. His voice was so soft, Pedro could barely hear it.

"Could I—could I come over?"

For a long time, Balthazar didn’t speak. Pedro was almost certain he shouldn’t have asked. He was on the point of apologizing and telling Balthazar to forget he said anything, when Balthazar answered in the same soft voice:

"Okay."

**Author's Note:**

> Alternate ending in Chapter 2.


End file.
